It’s been a good week for our little spot on the Internet:

We got another very nice review click here.

And a very nice email:   So how’s the new year treating you?  Have you and ♀ even come up for air yet?   heh heh heh   I swear I can practically smell the endorphins from down here in Oregon.  I’m jealous, you know!   I’d say that for an old married couple you do excellently in the marital bed department.  Hmmm, maybe I should amend that to read marital bed, couch, shower…..   ;)    The first/last time my husband and I pulled off a “3 times in a day” fuckfest was before we even got married, and I was living at home with my parents.  I’m 47 now so you can see that it’s been a while.  I still remember it though.  It was 105 F (I cheated and looked at an online conversion table so that’d be 40.5 C for you) degrees outside and that third time was on the living room floor.

We had a very quiet and relaxed holiday season.  Got together with friends and family and I even got to hold a baby.  That’s always a highlight if you ask me.  I love babies, they’re so basic in their needs.  What’s even better, now that I’m older, is other people’s babies.  Hold them, cuddle them, then say goodbye and get a good night’s sleep.

I’m out of poof here so it’s time to change gears.  Keep up the good work (yeah, you know what I mean!).  I really enjoy reading your blog — nice pics too — and it gives me a definite jump start in the arousal department so thanks for that.

Cheers,
C.
PS — I’m still jealous.   lol

Last night, we found a stripper bar 15 minutes from home that we didn’t even know was there. Really, it hardly seems possible. We rarely bother to go anymore because they’re  all so far away. We were coming home from dinner and I noticed a little ‘Show-Lounge’ sign. So we stopped to check it out and low and behold, there was a naked girl on stage when we walked in. ♀ got so excited, she grabbed two seats right on gynecological row. I love going to see peelers with her. She’s the one throwing bills on stage and we always seem to get a little extra attention.

The last show we saw started while I was in the washroom and when she was finished, she came over to where we were sitting. She asked if we were married. We said ‘yes’. She asked how long. We told her coming up to fours years, but we’ve been together for just over six. She said when I walked back from the washroom , ♀ face lit up like a Christmas tree. She said it was so nice to see a couple so in love she just had to come over and tell us. Isn’t that amazing that total strangers can see it (But most of her family can’t)? She said it was her last dance of the night and she was going for take-out so we invited her over for a home-cooked meal and a pedicure, but she declined…I think she thought we were kidding.

You might be surprised why I started writing this blog. I am not by nature a very positive person. I’m moody. I’ve struggled with depression for…well…forever. I’m a difficult person to get to know. I offend people all the time, often by saying the most inappropriate things at the absolute wrong time. I can’t even begin to tell you all the bizarre shit that has spilled out of me that has pushed away really nice and decent people. I also have a knack for saying things that need to be said that no one else will, but that doesn’t win me any popularity contests.

But the thing that screws me up the most is I get stuck in my head. What I mean is shit happens and I can’t let it go…conversations will replay in my head or woulda, coulda, shoulda scenario’s play over and over. I’ve been for cognitive behavioral therapy. I know replaying these things is terribly unhealthy and feeds the depression, but letting them go can be SOOOO hard. ‘Changing how I think to change how I feel’ sounds simple, but there are times when actually doing it is SOOO hard.

Prior to the start of this blog, ♀ & I spent 18 months and a huge bucket of money on the ugliest custody/access battle you can imagine…no, seriously…picture the worst you can imagine and double it. My ex’s lawyer (a former judge) managed to drag things out until we could no longer afford a lawyer and I ended up doing a three-day trial on my own. It went…badly. Our former lawyer gave up her 10 year family law practice mostly because our case upset her that much.

When it was all done and over with (is that even possible?) I knew that I would need something to distract me.  Even now…16 months after the end of the trial, I catch myself replaying….all sorts of shit. I know I can’t change what happened, but it is so incredibly hard to let it go.

This blog was intended to be something positive I could focus on and I really think that I’ve been succeeding, but I haven’t done it alone. ♀ has been so supportive. Not only has she taken lots of pictures of me, but like many women (unfortunately) she has body image issues and she’s let me post numerous pictures of her. She hasn’t flinched when I’ve written about the most intimate details of our life. She is my muse, my hero, my…everything. Even though she’s the main reason why this blog is a success, she’d never really taken ownership of it…until this week.

I got quite misty-eyed when I saw this in the comments section the other day:  Thanks for all the great comments. Great minds think alike. It really was not that hard to pic my fav pics. Happy New Year to all our readers. XXXX

Who knows, maybe she’ll actually start writing some posts.

Anyway, I guess that’s all for tonight.

Cheers,

sss