One of the stations we listen to while toiling away in the sweat shop at night replays old-time radio shows. A couple of weeks ago there was  a detective show on (Sam Spade or Philip Marlow or Richard Diamond…) The lead female in the story was a librarian (she wears glasses of course). She thinks she’s stumbled upon a kidnapping and enlists the help of a PI. He doesn’t take her seriously so she does her own investigation. She gets captured by the kidnappers, but she has spunk and manages to keep them at bay until the very last moment when our handsome PI arrives to save the day. In the last scene as they’re driving back to town, the bookish librarian takes her hair out of its bun, tosses her glasses out the window and tells the hero to take her to the Bijou Theatre where the latest thriller is playing. When he asks her why she threw her glasses away she tells him she knows that boys don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses. The show ends with classic nudgenudgewinkwink music.

Seriously, was that ever a truism? I can’t imagine it.

Ok, there is a point to this. About four years ago ♀ needed to get glasses. Junior was still living at home and when his mom modeled her new glasses for the family, he got all flustered and said they made her look like a porn star. He was about 17. I have no idea what sort of porn he’d been watching, but I know for a fact that the next time we fucked I asked ♀ to wear her glasses.

I think I mentioned that I can no longer read the fine print, but to tell the truth reading most printed material has been a struggle for quite a while. I had an appointment with the optometrist (a real cutie btw) and I picked up my first pair of spectacles on Christmas Eve. The kids came over last night and I was reading the newspaper. The first thing Junior said when he saw me with my new peepers was, “wow, now you really look like a grandpa.”

How is that fair? ♀ gets glasses and looks like a porn star. I get glasses and look like a grandpa.

Cheers,

♀ & sss

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1 Comment »

1. 

   Well, from the pictorial evidence you’ve provided, I would say that the glasses flatter an already attractive specimen. (Admiring from afar. )

   Comment by Sapphire, Elegant Slut — January 13, 2011 @ 9:46 am

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